One summer, at an hour of an unprecedentedly hot sunset, two cars appeared in one of the Moscow yards. The first is a small-sized, compact urban hatchback. The second - wide, bright, with large wheel arches - is considered a crossover. Once in the shade of verdant limes, cars driven by their owners rushed to a single unoccupied place. Yes, we will not miss the main strangeness of this summer evening: only one thing, but the place still remained.
“This is my place,” the crossover driver claimed for a free scrap of asphalt.
“I don’t know anything,” the woman in the hatchback answered and for some reason was offended.
“I always stand here!” - the man brought an irresistible argument.
“I've never seen you before,” retorted the woman.
The life of the beautiful maiden was such that she was not used to such disputes. Turning pale, she goggled and thought in confusion: “If anything, I will cry.” Alas, the overweight man was not going to give up either. Then horror had taken possession of the young lady so that she closed her eyes. And when she opened, she saw that it was all over: the man waved her sausage fingers at her and went to the second round in search of another place. Painfully familiar picture, right? Moreover, conflicts in the stone jungle are not limited to this.
Numerous comrades, occupying one and a half parking spaces with their car, are the leaders of our small hit parade. You hate quiet drivers and dream of sending them to a driving instructor. Those who act in such a way that no one touches his "swallow" or simply out of harm, you hate even more and dream of shooting in your heart. How can you allow people to carry firearms! In the evenings, lovers of bright headlights separately get blind, and make it impossible to choose the right trajectory. “Bang! - a control shot in the head,”you dream.
The impossible is possible. “You can’t even imagine how much!” - you agree with the creators of the advertising slogan, nevertheless having blown up a car near the house after five “soothing” circles in the microdistrict.
Automotive realities break into life much earlier than an alarm clock. The limited playlist of alarms for many years has already been learned by all of them. A “phonogram” often sounds until the battery dies. But you run around all night to the nursery, and the owner of the screaming car, as a rule, sleeps quietly in the next house.
Did you survive the night? You have developed immunity. But in the morning, another problem is to break out of the captivity of the car that has "locked" you. A winning ticket is considered to be “only” a blocked driver's door. A cascade of pirouettes, trousers torn in an indecent place, a couple of dents in the ceiling - and you are finally in the driver's seat. "Strengthening, / Sobering up in the morning, / If still alive, gymnastics."
We move on to the next exercise: we’re driving away with a neighbor on a narrow patch next to the garbage bins. The only difficulty is in the third car, which was thrown on the eve the other day: one and a half meters to the curb, the wheels could be straightened … But no - why?
Couples in cars that do not allow parking. Lovers of music and "forward flow". Conquerors of the sidewalks. The irresponsible krivoruchki dissolving in a fog clinging to your car … But how many occasions for rage covering your eyes! The scenes that pass day after day in my mind's eye would be envied by Tarantino.